I hit answer, my voice practically bursting with panic: “What happened? Is our house on fire? Is Qingquan breaking up with Shang Chi? Or did the Trisolarans finally decide to invade Earth?!”

Xi Zhou: “…”

“None of the above?” I asked, completely bewildered. “Then why are you calling me?”

“It’s nine-thirty.”

I couldn’t make heads or tails of it. “Yeah… so what?”

His voice dropped a few degrees colder. “Xia Haowan, are you playing dumb with me right now? If you don’t get your butt back here right this second, you’re sleeping by yourself tonight.”

Me: “!!!”

“I’m coming back right now! Super fast! Just wait for me a tiny bit!”

I rushed back to the table, looking at Chu Qi with an apologetic grin. “I’m so sorry, an emergency popped up at home, I have to run.”

Chu Qi was super understanding and even enthusiastically drove her flashy red Porsche to drop me off right at the entrance of my apartment complex. I stepped out of the car with a forced, stiff smile, terrified that Xi Zhou might be standing up on the balcony watching the whole thing, if he saw this, I was dead meat.

When I got inside, the living room was pitch black. I darted straight into the bedroom. “I’m back!”

Xi Zhou was leaning against the headboard scrolling through his phone, not even bothering to lift an eyelid. Knowing I was in the wrong, I immediately took a shower and scrambled under the duvet like a completely harmless little creature.

“Why are you home so early today?” I asked, putting on my sweetest, butter-up tone as I stealthily scooted closer. “I thought you were working overtime again.”

Xi Zhou let out a soft huff, but he didn’t push me away. Seeing a ray of hope, I took another step forward and wrapped my arms around his arm. “Are you mad? Or did work not go smoothly?”

This time he didn’t huff, but his voice carried a faint, interrogation-like edge: “Xia Haowan, when you said you were a person with high clinginess needs… were you lying to me?”

“No way! That’s realer than real!”

“Is that so?” He finally flicked a glance at me. “I sure can’t tell. You had a grand old time tonight, didn’t you? Hours out without sending a single text. Is this your definition of ‘high clinginess’?”

I choked on my words. Embarrassment plus guilt equaled an awkward chuckle. “Well… my body was out, but my heart was right here with you!”

He scoffed, turned off the light, and lay down. Not sure if I had successfully pacified him or not, I stealthily propped myself up to sneak a peek, only for him to abruptly open his eyes. I flinched, lost my balance, and collapsed flat on top of him.

At that moment, there wasn’t a single romantic thought in my head, only two words: I’m dead.

Sure enough, his voice was sharp as a knife: “Xia Haowan, are you trying to crush me to death?”

“No, no, no!” I panicked, my hands wildly scrambling around for leverage to push myself up.

He let out a low grunt and grabbed my hand in a tight grip. “Stop moving around so carelessly.”

I froze instantly. The silence in the room became terrifyingly heavy. Shaking, I asked in a whisper: “…Xi Zhou, do your pajama pants… have a belt buckle?”

His voice sounded even more terrifying now: “What do you think?”

I drew in a sharp breath. So the thing I just touched… wasn’t a belt buckle. With my brain short-circuiting, I blurted out without thinking: “So… do you need me to help you?”

The moment the words left my mouth, I wanted to dig a hole and bury myself alive. But instead of pushing me away, he held my hand firmly in place, his voice dropping into a dangerously deep register: “Help me how?”

After a whole week of continuously having to “help” him, I had to slap a pain-relief patch onto my wrist. Far from showing any sympathy, Xi Zhou raised an eyebrow and teased: “Weak already?”

My jaw hit the floor. “How can you twist black into white like that?! It was clearly you who—”

Seeing that he seemed to be in a good mood, I took the opportunity to make an announcement: “I’m going to the movies tomorrow night. With Chu Qi.”

The coffee cup in his hand paused mid-air. “With who?”

“Your college classmate!” I honestly confessed everything, from the auction incident all the way to my previous lie. I thought honesty would earn me clemency, but instead, he coldly handed down three words: “You’re not going.”

My heart sank halfway into my chest. As I thought, he still cared about her! Was he afraid I might do something to hurt his “white moonlight”?

“On what grounds?!” My temper flared up too. “I’m going anyway!”

“Then you can sleep by yourself tonight.”

“If I sleep by myself, so be it! Who wants to sleep here anyway!” I grabbed my phone and stormed straight out.

I ran all the way to Qingquan’s place and buzzed the doorbell relentlessly until Shang Chi answered the door looking like he wanted to destroy the entire world. His shirt was misaligned, his lips unnaturally red, and he bellowed: “Xia Haowan! Why is it you again?!”

Qingquan pulled me inside and gently consoled me after learning I had fought with Xi Zhou over Chu Qi. Just like that, I commandeered the master bedroom, banishing Shang Chi to the living room sofa.

Shang Chi protested weakly: “This is unfair! You two had a fight, why are you forcing us to separate?!”

Qingquan gave him a sharp glare: “Who told you to run your mouth with all that ‘white moonlight’ nonsense?” Shang Chi shut his trap instantly.

Xi Zhou and I officially entered a cold war. The next day, I still went to the movies with Chu Qi. Seeing “heartbroken” practically written across my face, she immediately pried. I confessed truthfully: “I had a fight with Xi Zhou. He won’t let me hang out with you.”

Chu Qi looked surprised, then suddenly broke into a meaningful smirk: “Oh~”

“Do you… still like Xi Zhou?” I asked anxiously.

“God no! Who’d want that poker-faced jerk!” She waved her hand dismissively. “I just think it’s hilarious because it’s so rare to see him take a loss.”

Saying that, she pulled me close and held up her phone: “Come here, let’s take a cozy selfie to mess with him! Come on, make a finger-heart with me, babe!”

I dazedly complied, thinking to myself: If Xi Zhou sees this, he’s probably going to freeze this entire city solid.

Chu Qi kept wearing that mysterious “I know something you don’t know” smile, talking in riddles that left my head spinning like I was trapped in a detective thriller. In the end, I wandered back to seek refuge at Qingquan’s place in a haze.

Qingquan looked at me with concern: “How did it go?”

“It was… fine.” I let out a sigh. “Now I get why Xi Zhou used to like her. She’s gorgeous, free-spirited, and super good at making people happy.”

Qingquan patted my head in comfort: “Don’t sell yourself short, you have your own unique charm too.”

Out in the living room, Shang Chi was still “locked out” of the master bedroom. After bellowing in vain, he resorted to calling Xi Zhou to complain:

“Bro, it’s the second day already! Aren’t you coming to pick up your wife yet? Fight all you want, but don’t ruin our night life! A real man knows when to bend and when to stand tall—just look at me! And what’s all this nonsense about a white moonlight anyway?! What? You’re turning it back on me? The whole damn world knows Chu Qi is your white moonlight! Woah, why are you calling me an idiot the moment you open your mouth? Don’t make personal attacks!”

I pressed my ear against the door to eavesdrop, wondering to myself: What did Xi Zhou say that made Shang Chi jump up like that?

Half an hour later, there was a knock at the door. I thought it was Shang Chi again and decided to ignore it, but a familiar, low voice rang out from outside: “It’s me.”

I scrambled off the bed, ran over to open the door, and tried my best to maintain the calmest expression possible: “What are you doing here?”

“Here to clear things up,” Xi Zhou said straight to the point. “Chu Qi is not my white moonlight. Stop listening to that idiot Shang Chi’s nonsense.”

The guy called an “idiot” opened his mouth to protest, but Xi Zhou silenced him with a single glare cold enough to freeze hell over, leaving him only able to emit a weak whimpering sound.

“Really?” I remained skeptical. “Then why didn’t you let me meet her?”

Xi Zhou fell silent for a beat, then let out a heavy sigh: “Because Chu Qi likes girls.”

I slammed the door wide open, and at the exact same moment, Shang Chi next to me screamed at the top of his lungs: “SAY WHAT?!”

Shang Chi lunged forward as if he had just discovered a new continent: “No way! Weren’t you two the campus’s golden couple?!”

Xi Zhou shot him an indifferent look: “First of all, that title was slapped on us by other people, and we’ve denied it a million times. Second of all, where on earth did you see any romantic feelings between us? We couldn’t say two sentences without starting a fight.”

Shang Chi stubbornly held his ground: “That’s classic enemies-to-lovers behavior! Hating each other on the surface, pining for each other in secret!”

Xi Zhou turned back to me: “See? You actually managed to get into a fight with me over believing a creature like this?” He then turned to give Qingquan a deeply concerned look: “Intelligence is hereditary, you should really think twice before marrying him.”

Qingquan: “…”

Shang Chi panicked: “Hey, hey! Just because you can’t coax your own wife doesn’t mean you can go around sabotaging other people’s marriages!”

My brain started operating at maximum capacity: Xi Zhou doesn’t like Chu Qi, Chu Qi actually likes girls… So his forbidding me from seeing her was because…

Xi Zhou gave my head a gentle flick: “Chu Qi likes girls just like you. I was afraid you’d get seduced away by her, got it, Idiot Number Two?”

My heart went thump-thump like a frantic drum. Before I could even feel touched, Shang Chi activated his game-ruining mode again: “I get it now! Back when Chu Qi went abroad, you didn’t go see her off because you genuinely didn’t want to go, not because you were hiding in the dorm crying your eyes out, right?!”

Xi Zhou: “…”

Qingquan: “…”

Afraid that staying any longer would cause us to “catch” Shang Chi’s IQ, Xi Zhou dragged me away into the night. When we got back home, seeing the Christmas tree and the hamburger sofa felt as comforting as reuniting with family.

“What are you smirking at?” I glared at Xi Zhou, who was leaning against the wall with a faint, playful grin. “I haven’t fully forgiven you yet! Do you have any idea how much I suffered from trying not to text you when you didn’t reply?!”

“I wanted to text you very much,” he said serenely. “But you had to unblock me first.”

Me: “…” Oh right, I actually did block him. I hurriedly opened my phone, letting out an awkward giggle: “So, what were you planning to text me?”

“Not telling.”

I stammered awkwardly: “Xi Zhou, do you… l-like me…?”

Before I could turn and run, he pulled me back, looking straight into my eyes: “I do. Very much.”

I instantly let out a silly, goofy grin: “Hehe! Wouldn’t it have been so much better if you just said that earlier?! It’s your fault for talking so mean and threatening to make me sleep alone!”

“I regret it. I’ll do better next time.” He smiled, leaning down to plant a soft kiss on my lips.

Gasping for air, I wrapped my arms around his neck: “I’m super clingy, you know. Can you really handle it?”

“Actually,” he murmured slowly, his eyes darkening with a heavy, deliberate intensity, “my needs are pretty high, too.”

“In what way?!”

He scooped me up into his arms, striding straight toward the bedroom: “You’ll find out in a minute.”

Chu Qi was so frustrated she wanted to punch a wall when she found out Xia Haowan was already taken. On what grounds did that poker-faced Xi Zhou get to land such an adorable girl?!

To annoy the living hell out of him, she sent Xi Zhou an ultra-cozy selfie she took with Haowan, complete with a heart emoji. The next morning, she received a voice note from him, something that had literally never happened before.

In the audio clip, Haowan’s voice was soft and sweet, acting like a spoiled brat: “Who does Haowan like?” — “I like you…” Followed by subtle, intimate wet kissing sounds that would make anyone’s face flush beet red.

Chu Qi gritted her teeth: “What a petty, narrow-minded man! So what if you have a wife, big deal?!”